Hey Arnold! - "Helga Sleepwalks"

Once upon a midnight dreary, I woke up running out of ideas weak and weary until I realized, now is the perfect time to get back into the reviewing community. And tonight, we're reviewing "Helga Sleepwalks."

The story is that Helga Pataki, still on her love for Arnold frenzies, is starting to sleepwalk all over the city. Know why? Must have something to do with her dad's pork rinds. How can she get out of this? Watch to find out. But first, let me explain what are pork rinds, Pork rind is the culinary term for the skin of a pig. They could be confused to be potato chips if you ask me. And sleepwalking is something that happens when while you are asleep, your body loses complete control and you walk in your sleep, It is classified as a sleep disorder. And take it from me, I never sleepwalked ever.

This episode is pretty interesting. There are several episodes that had cartoon characters sleepwalking that I'll review in the future. I sympathize with Helga as usual, she's too nervous to confess her love as usual. It's pretty funny when Gertrude, Arnold's grandmother, mistakes her for some old childhood friend of hers. And yet again, Miriam lost the purse on the top of the car, again, like in "Road Trip." I also like the minor reference to William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet. But anyway, Helga is just so scared and trembling with fear that she may never be able to sleep ever again. But the thing is sleep is important.

One more thing, don't eat too much pork rinds, otherwise you'll end up in sleepwalk mode like Helga did. I do have one burning question. How, and I do mean HOW on Earth did Helga end up in the boarding house shower?! That came totally out of nowhere, ladies and gentleman. That's just crazy. And worse than that. THAT'S JUST.............weird. But overall, I thought the episode was okay, it didn't blow my mind or anything but it wasn't that bad.

Oh yeah, there's a Quick Draw McGraw reference in this episode, please, PLEASE, look for it.

Hey Arnold! - "Helga's Love Potion"

To love, or not to love, that is the question for Helga G. Pataki in our next review. I know it's super bowl night, but I'm more focused on this, okay? This episode was directed by Dan Povenmire with storyboards done by Dan and Sherm Cohen, the storyboard supervisor for SpongeBob.

Helga gets tired of her love for Arnold making her feel mad and mixed up all the time. After considering it, she goes in to a "gypsies" store, asking her for a potion that will make her fall out of love. Out of her sight, the gypsy gives her a "potion" that would erase Helga's feelings  After drinking that "potion." Upon waking, Helga feels unusually bland. Know how I know? Because she acts more like a civilized person more than a bully with a passion for love. She moves quietly about the day, not responding to any aggression. This doesn't feel like her at all if you ask me. Can she get out of this blandness? Well, just watch and yourself.

This is a pretty weird episode, but in a good way. It has a lot of good laughs, for example, Brainy beating the heck out of himself since Helga was under the "spell." And I say all of this with air-quotes because the twist is that the potion is actually grape juice, boy did Helga get ripped off by a con person? Probably the weirdest part of the episode is that by the time Helga drinks the "potion," she goes through a extremely upside-down dream sequence! Which has her breaking the locket, her sinking into ice cream, and landing flat onto her bed, and it's not mentioned again! It's definitely a Big-Lipped Alligator Moment! Also, this is one of the few episodes where Helga uses the word "crap." I wonder why they got away with that in a cartoon like this. If I didn't know better, Francesca Marie Smith probably ad-libbed that line unscripted without Nickelodeon even noticing, either that, or she just says that by herself whenever she gets frustrated in real life, but that's just me.

So, the moral of the story is never trust a gypsy who want your money, second, don't drink any sort of love potion made out of grape juice, otherwise, you'll end up having weird dream sequences. Also, you can't escape your obsession no matter what you do. You are who you are and you can't change that. And Helga had to learn that out the hard way.

Overall, this episode is pretty weird, but funny, and good, funny and good. Yep, those are the three words I can describe this episode, folks.

Hey Arnold! - "Road Trip" Review

Tired of having a mother \who sounds like she's drunk all the time? Do you not like the Hey Arnold episode, "Grandpa's Birthday?" Well, fear not, because his is the episode for you! Let's see what happens when Helga and her mother, Miriam go on a road trip.

After making a mother's day card for Miriam, at home, Big Bob gets a phone call from Dallas, Texas saying they want a whole load of beepers from his emporium and decides to leave both Miriam and Helga behind. This gets Helga stuck in the front seat next to Miriam on their way to South Dakota. They come across all sorts of things, a hotel, country music, and even a restaurant. When their car breaks, and Miriam lost her purse in the process, Miriam sees a flyer for a mechanical bull ride that would grant them a big winner prize of  $500.00! How will they get their trip going again? Watch and see for yourself, partner! Okay, onto the review.

If I thought "Grandpa's Birthday" was a bad episode because it was just boring and Grandpa Phil was being such an idiot, than this episode made up for it with a Helga centered episode. It pulls out all the stops, quality time with one's parent, even going so far as to shouting out "TRUCK!" every time we come across one. I also like the idea of an old-country western restaurant, like Floyd's Restaurant for example. Heck, we use to have a country-western related restaurant in Foley where I live, it was called Wild Bill's Pizza, but that place unfortunately went out of business and got replaced with a Chinese restaurant, sadly.

So, bottom line, I still like Helga calls her mom by her real name, Miriam that is, and I must say, the road trip and the mechanical bull thing did eventually pay off. Also during the closing credits, you can hear the voice of  Kate Miner singing "We Got Tomorrow," which was written by Craig Bartlett, while the episode itself was written by Jonathan Greenberg.

On top of that, there's still a lot of good laughs, and a great satire on road trips. Well, get along little doggies, YEE HAW!

Hey Arnold! - "Ms. Perfect"

That's enough Angelica for a while, let's go for something Helga related. How about, hmm.......I know, "Ms. Perfect."

This episode gives the debut appearance of the secondary character, :Lila Sawyer. She's just as cute as Nermal from Garfield and Friends. Helga, Rhonda, and Phoebe do their best to make her fit in, but then they become jealous when Lila has almost about every bit of their personality on her personality check. They're so jealous that they decide to pull some pranks on her, rotten pranks if you ask me. And this is just so mean of these characters to do to a poor innocent little girl.

Okay, what do I like about this episode? Well, Arnold's not in it, it's more focused on Helga and her friends Rhonda and Phoebe. Phoebe's jealous of her knowledge, Rhonda's jealous of Lila's wardrobe, and she even becomes friends with the lunch lady. Do I think Lila's character got a bit Mary Sue at times? Yeah, sure, but not all the way Mary Sue like. And that's what I like about the character, she's not all that perfect, not like Chloe from the Fairly OddParents whose character in the show is very, very forced. Almost as much as changing their animation to Flash Animation is SO forced! Okay, back on track. It's also another one of those Helga Karma Trips. The parts where Helga got beaten up by Big Patty are justified because Helga was acting like a jerk, and it was satisfying to see her get comeuppance for her sour attitude.

I also like the fact that Lila isn't entirely perfect. She doesn't have a mother, and she and her father only have a limited supply of food until her dad can find a steady, well-paying job. Helga and her friends regret all of their actions and apologize to her in the end, and the best news of all, Lila's dad gets a job!

So, the moral of the story is, don't be jealous of your new friends just because they might have the same traits as you, and don't prank them into being miserable. This is a pretty well thought out dramatic episode. Take it from me and watch it. I really felt bad for Lila and Helga when they cried. Well, that's all for now. See you Sunday when I review "Ransom."

Hey Arnold! - "Olga Comes Home"

I don't usually watch the first season episodes because, the animation's not as good as the episodes that Sae Rom animated a season later. But, this is a good episode I liked from the first season. Here, let me give you the basic plot.

The episode centers around Helga who has to deal with her big sister, Olga, who's coming home from college to spend spring break with the other Pataki's. Helga gets so jealous, when suddenly, the doorbell rings, mail comes on, and it turns out to be Olga's grades from the college she attends. And Helga discovers that Olga as usual, has gotten straight A's in all of her classes. So, with an evil smirk on her face, she decides to change one of the grades to a B+! When Olga sees the B+, she goes into a deep, deep depression, much to the chagrin of Bob and Miriam, but to the delight of Helga. Will Helga admit her faults? Fat chance.

What I like is how they handle Olga's depression in this episode. You see, unlike "The End of Silliness," at least Olga's depression here isn't trying to make light of the actual mental illness, and is instead more depression in the way of something really bad happen to him and he feels sad about it It's portrayed way better than in that VeggieTales episode I mentioned. It's funny too, I like Helga's William Shakespeare bit she does when she decides on whether or not to change Olga's grades. I also likes Big Bob's efforts to get Olga to snap out of it, leading up to, "BUT THESE ARE THIRD ROW CENTER SEATS, OLGA!"

So, what's the final verdict? The episode is quite good actually. For a first season and the only one that was not done by Sae Rom Animation, it manages to tell a story quite good. I still had to question Helga's character design during the first season, she looks a little bit too much like a monkey. I wouldn't be surprised. It was written by the same person who wrote "Monkey Business" a couple of months later in 1997.

The moral here is that sisters will always keep secrets even if what the other did was wrong and dumb.

Hey Arnold! - "Big Bob's Crisis"

Let's take a look at an interesting episode of the fifth season of Hey Arnold!, "Big Bob's Crisis." Oh, man, where do I even start?

After having a heart attack/gas attack from eating so many lambs. Yuck! Big Bob Pataki has a vision of his past anger issues with orphans, birthday presents, firing employees from his beeper emporium, and ticking off a happy sunshine guy. This results him waking up in the hospital, and leaving to start a new life. and it's just so crazy! He gives away all of the houses prized possessions, and even Olga and Miriam's dignity. Helga's the only child who isn't affected by this, and she tires so desperately to get her same father back.

What can I say about this episode. All I can say is that well, it's pretty much promising, we see what happens when Big Bob's anger goes so out of hand and tries desperately to gain a new life and generosity. The only thing that kind of bugged me was that Helga just calls Arnold a creep when he was just trying to help out a friend. Yeah sure, she has a secret crush on Arnold, but that's no excuse to call him a creep. Need I remind you by the way that this was Arnold's only scene in the episode, by the way? I did find some parts that were funny however. Like Big Bob having a chest pain and mistaking Helga for Olga, which Big Bob was unaware that Olga's back at their house, speaking of which, I like Olga's line

"DADDY'S GONE COMPLETELY CRAZY!" That's Nika Futterman at her finest here. She may be from New York, but she has a strange foreign accent for Olga, kind of makes you wonder how that happened.

What;'s the final thought here? The episode may have it's problems, like Big Bob speaking in third person a few times as well as trying to make his family (including Olga) to move away to Oregon, barefoot, and Helga being mad at Arnold for no good reason, but all those problems aside, this is an okay episode. It's not great, but it's good. All I can say is that Olga is pretty lucky to keep the hut. It's pretty much a mid-life crisis episode, kind of like SpongeBob's "Mid-Life Crustacean," and The Fairly OddParents, "Engine Blocked."

If you like those stories, then you may like this one.

Hey Arnold! The Jungle Movie Review

I didn't cry at the end of Hey Arnold! The Jungle Movie, just saying that right now. I know it's awkward to bring up, but with that in mind, not everybody;'s going to like this movie like I did. I just thought it be important that I bring that up before I say the rest. With that said, Hey Arnold! The Jungle Movie was the final chapter in the Hey Arnold series,. Everybody had waited so long for this movie to happen to see if whether or not Arnold can go find his parents. They said it was emotional, they said it was funny, they said it was dark, they said it was creative, some people didn't like it, the list goes on, yadda, yadda, yadda. They went crazy for it. I think it’s good. Yeah, you know. It’s good, uh...Okay, okay, let’s just go into the story.

Arnold Shortman, now in 5th grade and is in the last day of school has to do an important assignment from Mr. Simmons, voiced by Dan Butler, about doing a montage of all the great things they've done over the years, and the winner, will get a trip to San Lorenzo, and sure enough, Helga steps in and helps the football head win the contest by editing the montage together into one giant thing, and oddly enough, they won the contest, that's right, Arnold and his friends achieved a first-class one way ticket to San Lorenzo!

When they arrive in San Lorenzo, they meet up with the bad guy, Lasombra, voiced by Alfred Molina, disguising himself as Eduardo, Miles and Stella's Indiana Jones like friend, to lure them into his trap to find the precious corazon from the Green-Eyed People. Alfred Molina has been in numerous films, including the first Indiana Jones movie, Raiders of the Lost Ark, starring Harrison Ford. So, Arnold, Gerald, and Helga have to avoid Lasombra to find the Green-Eyed People and break them out of the sleeping sickness curse.

The funny thing about Hey Arnold! The Jungle Movie is that really, this should be my favorite. It goes everywhere that I wanted Arnold to go to get to San Lorenzo, after the TV movie episode, "The Journal," aired on Nickelodeon, I said to myself, "The next part should be about what happens when Arnold finally comes to San Lorenzo to find his long lost parents and what happens when Helga reveals her true love for Arnold." And that’s exactly what happens. Moving on. And once again, we have a legitimate threat that does have a backstory that makes him sort of credible. So why don’t I like this one as much as The Lion King or MLP: The Movie, especially when everyone else in the world seems to regard it as a masterpiece? I don’t know. Maybe there’s too much focus on them trying to get out, maybe it's focused more on Arnold, Gerald, and Helga trying to find the green-eyed people, maybe we didn't get to see what happened to the other kids after the grown-ups stepped in to save them, but I digress. I'll address the Elephant in the Room, Lasombra! I never enjoyed the villain all that much, he just looked like Eduardo's doppelganger, and Alfred Molina? Why?! Why couldn't they cast someone legitimate like Mr. Lawrence or Jeremy Irons. I mean, look at Lasombra, he looks like a character Jeremy Irons would play. I get that Alfred Molina was Craig Bartlett's only choice for the voice of the villain, and I don't blame Alfred for this, it's just, it wasn't the right casting. So, if you had someone who was looking for corazon, you’d probably keep him away from your kids, too.

So, there, I've stated my complaint about the villain which I'm sure will get me a lot of hate for that, so, of course, you must think I don’t like this film. Well, no. I still think it’s a very, very good film. In fact, I actually do think it’s a great way to end the Hey Arnold franchise. It has my favorite characters, including Olga as seen in this picture here, as well as Rhonda, who spends most of the film having quite a bad hair day it still has a lot of good laughs, it has, surprisingly, a lot of suspense, and, hey, it's still Hey Arnold! And for a lot of people, this represents something that they grew up with as children, and maybe that’s why so many people do react the way they do at the very end.

A lot of kids who didn't know who their parents are were Arnold's age when the show first aired on Nickelodeon, so to watch themselves grow up and to watch the show actually grow up with them as well probably mirrors a lot of developments that a lot of people in the audience have gone through. Maybe in the end, this was the film's secret. It knew just when to come out and it knew just when to stop. It reached just the right age bracket and decided to grow up with us. And for those who didn’t grow up around the same age, maybe this film brought it back to them,..Maybe they hit something that not only do we all remember, but we all hold so precious and close to us. Whatever this film did, it did it right, the hopes of seeing Arnold finally finding his parents in San Lorenzo had finally come to pass. I'm afraid I have no other choice but to here by decree that Arnold is henceforth no longer parentless, which I suppose is what henceforth means, but no matter, Arnold, go on! Give all your parents the lost time to make up!

Let the world know, near and far, including but not limited to, my mom and dad, that this is not the end of Arnold's hopes and dreams! No! Quite the contrary, Arnold's life with his family has just begun!

But please don't reboot the series, please?

This review is dedicated with respect and admiration to the memory of Jack Riley.

The star of Rugrats and The Bob Newhart Show. we will miss you all.

Rest in peace: 1935-2016

Hey Arnold! - "Olga Gets Engaged"

"Olga Gets Engaged" was the second episode to feature Helga's older and midriff-baring sister. And as much as I like her character, I'm not sure what to feel about this episode. Anyways, it was written by the voice of Arnold's Mom herself, Antoinette Stella.

At school, Helga's friends Rhonda and Phoebe are excited about another one of Olga's visits, and Helga sarcastically just looks forward to it. She has mixed feelings on her bib sister. Sometimes, she might like her, but most of the time, she does not.. Helga always gets annoyed whenever Olga visits from college.

Olga comes to the Pataki residence and explains the big news, she decides to drop out of college because she met a man named Doug/ Bob and Miriam are shocked by this bit of news, but Helga is quite thrilled, thinking this might be Olga's fall from grace and wonders when they'll meet Doug.

At dinner, the Patakis meet Doug, who swoons over Olga, and Helga wonders how long have they've known each other. Bob and Miriam are against the idea that they're rushing into marriage.

While Bob says to Doug that he doesn't adjust, but Helga sympathies with Olga saying that it's not fair for Olga between Doug and them.

This reduces Olga to tears because, well, she suffers from perfectionism, and she's just so miserable, and runs into her room crying. I think it's time for me to talk about her crying, sometimes, whenever she cries, some black make-up falls down her eyes, she's not even wearing mascara, how is it even running?! Oh, well, no matter. Doug runs after Olga, and Helga says "If I played by cards straight, I could get rid of Olga for good." with a devilish smile on her face.

Up in Olga's room, Helga demands her to snap out of it, but Olga's so upset that she can't. Helga auggests that she and Doug run away and get married, Olga rejects to this considering she couldn't elope, and mom and dad would be furious. Helga knows that would be awful, but it's worse than thinking about life without Doug. Ultimately, Olga does give in, and Helga tells her to start packing and Helga will sneak the ladder out the window, and that she and Doug will be married in no time. Olga doesn't know how to thank her and thinks they're really bonding as wo sisters. As Helga closes the door, she says to herself, "Oh boy!"

As Helga gets out the later, she witnesses Doug telling ridiculous lies to Bob and Miriam, which ultimately results into them changing their minds. Helga was confused at first, saying, "What is going on, he hated him a while ago."

Helga comes back into Olga's room, saying to cancel running away, because there's been a change of plans, Doug won him over. Olga rejoices and says "Oh, I knew it, I'd just knew they'd love him." as she hugs herself with joy.

The next day, Helga explains her problems to Arnold about Olga dating a complete liar. Arnold suggests that if your sister or brothers are in trouble, you should help them, but Helga just rejects that thought, and, as usual, Arnold just tells her, forget he said what he had to say.

At dinner, as Doug and Olga are re-enacting a portion of William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, Helga fantasizes about what would happen if they actually got married, living in a run down apartment with Doug lying about doing great things while Olga is miserable, Helga laughs at her little fantasy.

On the day of the wedding, Olga can't tell how much she's lucky to have a sister like Helga. and from that point on, Helga decides she just can't go through with her plan.

Helga catches Doug red-handed calling his own girlfriend, and Helga does what Arnold told her to do earlier, help out a sibling in need. She demands that Doug should leave or she'll expose him for the phony liar that he is, even going so far as to threatening to push the redial button to tell her girlfriend about his lies and cheating. Upon hearing this, Doug leaves and exits the door!

With Doug gone and out of the way, to make sure Olga knows about his disappearance, Helga writes a note that says it was from Doug. Olga is touched by everything that the note says, she cries, once again, with mascara falling down her face without having any one whatsoever. And Helga just tells her "You crybaby!" And the episode just ends.

I don't get it.





Honestly, I don't think the episode was good or terrible, just weak. But, if YOU are a fan of Helga or Hey Arnold! Go ahead and watch the episode if you choose to, I have nothing against that, okay?

Hey Arnold! - "Monkey Business"

This is all around my favorite Helga episode from Hey Arnold! In this episode, after catching an encounter with a monkey in the park from an organ grinder, Helga starts to believe that she's suffering with fear from monkeynucleosis. Apparently a parody of mononucleosis.

Symptoms of this sort of disease includes

1. Itching and Puffiness
2. Sweaty Palms
3. Lack of Appetite
4. Irritability
   and finaly
5. Expiration.

You do have to remember by the way that Helga always has a tendency to be irritable, mostly due to her dark secrets about her love for Arnold and bully personality.

What I like about this episode is the fact that it's mostly about Helga fearing she's going to expire, and no, they never say the word die, because apparently, you can't say "die" on a kids show, despite the fact she said it in "Haunted Train" but that's another story. Anyways, to get back on track, this is an occasional instance where Helga would indeed get scared. The only thing in the episode that kind of freaked me out was the nightmare she had about being a monkey and too late to confess her love for Arnold. The episode could be like an opposite of "A Case of Ed" from Ed, Edd n Eddy in a sense, except that in that episode, Double D worried about having Lack-a-Daisy-Cathro Disease mainly due to the fact that Ed and Eddy where tricking him whereas here, Helga worries about it because she's so delirious, oh, and she didn't get teased at. Overall, a solid episode. You get sucked into Helga's dilemma, you feel bad for what she's going through, and you want to see her come out okay. P.S. This episode felt like something that Helga's voice actress, Francesca Marie Smith wrote.